What’s A Girl To Do?

For a very long time I considered myself an analyst, but not in the sense that I get paid for analyzing things. My analyzing is mostly about my own life and romantic relationships.

Apparently I’m not alone, not that I ever thought I was. Today I’ve come across two editorials about just that sort of thing that I’ve been worried about since,  well seems like since I was 13 or so. The Observer has a post about the Cautionary Matron, older, wiser women entering into their 40s either unwed or divorced and “realizing that ‘having it all’ was really a lie.” They learned that their dreams of having a career, getting married, having a family and being successful in all those aspects didn’t really work out the way they had planned – or the way they had been led to believe.

Of course in the middle of reading The Observer’s post I stumbled across Jezebel’s piece on Marcus Buckingham‘s suggestion that women should outsource parts of their lives so they can stop worrying about it. Dear Marcus, I don’t think letting someone else take care of our laundry is going to make us stop worrying if they are going to shrink our favorite sweater.  Though,  I understand his point about the importance of “the now” instead of the past or future.

Still, it all  seems to just bring up more stuff to worry about, the Cautionary Matron article especially. Though it sort of confirms and further cements my hunch that I’m going to die alone. No biggie though, at least I know what’s coming.

One Decision

So for about a year or so I’ve been thinking about where I want to move next. I’ve been thinking about my whole future actually but that never tends to work out so well so I figured I should concentrate on my 5, even 3, year plan.

I know I want to explore the world and I don’t really know where I want to settle down just yet. I’ve done Los Angeles, I’ve done San Francisco. So my plan was to try and figure it out. I made up a list of cities that I’d consider living and told myself I’d go visit those cities. These cities included New York (I’ve been there several times before), Portland (check, did that last year), Seattle, Chicago, Vancouver, and Washinton D.C.

The thing is, I think I’m still in love with San Francisco. So what am I doing?

Am I forcing myself to see what else is out there because I don’t want to settle for what I’ve already had? What is more important? Going with what I want right now? Or planning for the future?

So I’ve recently decided that I should just go with it. If San Francisco is what I’m feeling then San Francisco is where I should be. And if it doesn’t work out, I can try other cities. No one is making me stay there forever. Who knows what will happen in the future, maybe I’ll end up in Cardiff or something, but I know for right now, I still love SF.